Of Spoilers and Sonic Screwdrivers
by Of-Spoilers-and-Bowties
Summary: Things were different now. Different wasn't bad or good. It was just different. Things had changed, he had changed. Though things had changed and were different, River still loved the cosmic Time Lord. Chapter 7 is up. A series of one-shots featuring River/Doctor. (Originally was going to be just Eleven/River, but I got carried away...)
1. Chapter 1

"_You are impossible,"_ River growled, trudging through the mud, her mind back where she had abandoned her very _expensive_, very _nice_ heels. Her dress was stained, ripped, and overall ruined, and there was one man and one man only to blame: The Doctor.

"Do you know how much I paid for those shoes?" River hissed.

The Doctor sighed, "River, I'll buy you new shoes? Okay?"

"New shoes won't be the same!" River huffed, "I wore those shoes to Queen Elizabeth's coronation! I wore those shoes to one of my most successful dig sites!" If River's dress wasn't clenched in her fists to keep it from getting completely ruined, she had a pretty good idea that she would strangle a certain bow tie wearing Time Lord.

"You wore heels to a dig site?"

River huffed, "That's not the point. The point is you can't replace those shoes!"

The Doctor spun around; pointing a finger in her face, "Well, if you would wear more sensible shoes!"

"Well, if you could take me on a date without angering the locals!"

"Oi!" the Doctor protested, "He made fun of my bow tie! And bow ties are cool!"

River sighed; he was practically a five year old. A cosmic one at that.

Huffing, the Doctor spun around and continued his trek through the mud, pushing away the underbrush. River followed him. Would someone like to remind her why she fell in love with this man and why she's married to him?

"Because, I am incredibly handsome and clever," the Doctor answered.

_Had she said that out loud?_

River frowned, "Are you now? Because, _husband_, I seriously doubt it!"

The Doctor spun around, "Are you saying I'm not clever, _wife_?"

River sighed and threw her arms in the air, "I don't know, you tell me!"

The Doctor smiled, "Would you rather me show you?"

River rolled her eyes, "Why not?" She said, not a trace of amusement to be found.

The Doctor grabbed her hands, "I need you to close your eyes."

River raised an eyebrow, "Do I have to?"

"Yes."

River sighed for the billionth time that night before complying hesitantly. She felt her hair being whipped around briefly before the Doctor squeezed her hands gently.

"Alright," the Doctor dropped her hands, "You can open them."

River opened her eyes, a smile lighting up her face.

They had appeared in the TARDIS console room. The ship hummed, welcomingly.

River turned to her husband, who stood to the side, smug, to say the least.

River shook her head, a small smile on her lips. "Okay, I admit. That was impressive."

The Doctor puffed out his chest and straightened his bow tie. "Perhaps, maybe impressive enough to admit I'm clever?" He raised an eyebrow for extra emphasis and tapped her nose.

River rolled her eyes good naturedly. She kissed him gently, "Yes, Sweetie. You're very clever."

The Time Lord beamed, "Thank you, dear."

River smiled. The Doctor was impossible, but in a good way.

**_I do not own Doctor Who. No profit is being made of this story in any way, form, or fashion._**

**_Please feel free to send me a prompt on tumblr at: of-spoilers-and-bowties._**

**_Reviews and comments are appreciated._**


	2. Chapter 2

The squealing of a little girl echoed off the library walls as the Doctor chased his daughter.

"I'm going to get you!"

Amelia squealed once more as her father tickled her sides. She giggled and dashed around the corner, the Doctor following after. He came around the corner, snatched up the little girl and blew on her stomach.

"Daddy! Daddy, stop!" Amelia pleaded.

The sound of something shattering filled the air and both father and daughter froze. The Doctor slowly turned around, hoping that it was just his imagination.

The Time Lord set his daughter down slowly.

The girl looked up at her father, wide, innocent eyes bore into his. They both looked down at the shattered remains of what used to be River's favorite vase from one of her first dig sites. It was a dusty old thing, wasn't in good condition to begin with, but having it be in a million pieces, shattered on the the floor was definitely not going to end well.

"It wasn't me." Amelia protested quietly.

"I know, I know," the Doctor said. Honestly it was both their faults, but that wouldn't matter to River.

The Doctor pinched the bridge of his nose. Perhaps River's rule of no running in the library was valid.

"Your mother is going to kill us." The Doctor groaned.

"She wouldn't kill me," The four year old stated. "Mummy loves me."

The Doctor picked up his daughter, ignoring her squeals, and spun her around. "Are you saying Mummy doesn't love me?" The Doctor asked, pretending to be stern. Amelia was thrown into a fit of giggles and the Doctor's laughter joined hers.

He kissed his daughter's forehead lovingly. "We still have the matter of the broken vase."

"When will Mummy be back?"

"Soon."

"How soon is soon?" Amelia tilted her head slightly.

"Too soon," the Doctor answered and sighed.

"We could get her a new one." Amelia offered.

The Doctor shook his head, "There is no other case like that in the universe. And if there was, your mum would know the difference."

"You'll have to tell her."

The Doctor looked down with astonishment at his daughter, "Me?" He asked.

Amelia nodded.

"Why does it have to be me?" The Doctor whined. "Why can't you do it?"

Amelia gave her father a pointed look and the Time Lord sighed. "You helped break it too." The Doctor grumbled.

"Helped break what?"

The Doctor eyes grew wide, a look a horror flashed across his face, because being on the receiving end of River's wrath, let alone a pregnant River, was terrifying. He turned around, a fake smile on his face.

"Hello, dear."

River stood there, looking unimpressed. Her wild hair was pulled back and her hands were resting on her swollen stomach.

"What did you break?" River huffed, placing a hand on her hip.

The Doctor rushed forward, "It's nothing dear, me and Amelia were just discussing that we broke the record for eating the most Jammie Dodgers."

River raised and eyebrow but didn't question her husband."Would you like some tea?" The Doctor asked, guiding his wife out of the library, sending his daughter a look.

_'I'll be back'_

Amelia nodded, '_I'll be here, Daddy.'_

~DW~DW~

"Okay, the Doctor said, clapping his hands together. "I think I know where we can-"

The Doctor paused and looked on, astonished as his daughter placed a non shattered vase, back on the shelf.

Amelia turned around, a smile on her face.

"Daddy! Daddy! Guess what the TARDIS did?" The child ran towards her father.

"What?" The Doctor said, looking down at his daughter.

"She fixed it Daddy! The TARDIS fixed it!"

The Doctor huffed mentally, despite the smile on his face.

"Did she now?"

_'You know doing that in the first place w__ould have saved me a lot of trouble. Now what am I to do with an exact copy of that vase?' _The Doctor asked in annoyance at the ship.

The TARDIS hummed, clearly amused.

~DW~DW~

_**I hope you guys enjoyed that! I know it wasn't really River/Eleven, but this has been eating at me for awhile...**_

_**Leave me a prompt on tumblr at: of-spoilers-and-bowties. Your thoughts and reviews are appreciated. **_

_**I do not own Doctor Who.**_


	3. Chapter 3

"You, Amelia Pond," the Doctor said, pausing to tap Amy's nose as he danced around the console, "said you wanted adventure!"

"I set the TARDIS to random, so who knows where we are!" The Doctor announced, flipping one last switch on the console. "I give you adventure."

Amy smiled widely at the Doctor.

The Doctor swung open the TARDIS doors and quickly slammed them with a yelp.

"What?" Amy asked, running over to the doors.

"What's out there?" She asked trying to get past the Doctor, whose limbs were stretched out to block the threshold.

"Nothing!" He said quickly, his voice higher than normal.

Amy lifted an eyebrow, "Is it a girl?"

The Doctor hesitated not quite sure how to answer.

Amy tried to pry the Doctor off the threshold and get to the doors. Suddenly she stopped and took a step back.

Amy smirked slightly, "Is it a naked girl?"

The Doctor's eyes grew wide, "No!" He insisted, locking the TARDIS doors, "It's been a long day. Why don't we take you home?"

He bounded over to the TARDIS console and before Amy had a chance to protest, the TARDIS had landed.

He waved her goodbye and causally leaned against the TARDIS console. His eyes followed her form. Amy gave him one last suspicious look before walking out of the doors.

"Bye!" He waved, craning his neck to make sure she was really gone.

The Doctor snapped his fingers, shutting the TARDIS doors. He jumped up from his faked relaxed position and flipped switches on the console.

The TARDIS landed with the familiar wheezing. The Doctor ran to the door and threw them open once more.

He was met with the same situation as before.

There was a girl standing there, if that's what you could even call her anymore.

Her greasy hair clung to her skull, some of it coming out in clumps. Her skin bloated, tinted purple and green. Her once hazel eyes clouded over. And the rotten smell of death accompanied her.

The Doctor grimaced, "I'm sorry," he whispered, "I'm so sorry."

She lifted her head and looked at the Time Lord, a groan coming from her throat. She lunged forward, teeth clacking together.

The Doctor jumped back, startled by her sudden movement.

The long dead girl didn't stop, but lunged again, this time grabbing the Doctor. The Doctor struggled to shake her off and tried to scramble away. His foot caught on a root, sending him to the ground, a rock wedged uncomfortably between his shoulder blades.

The undead girl fell ontop of him, her clacking teeth inches from his face. The stench of death filling his nostrils. The Time Lord tried not to gag as he tried to push the zombie off of him.

A loud crack resonated through the air. The girl lie still. The Doctor pushed the body off himself and stood.

"Hello Sweetie."

The Doctor's eyes fell on River's form. Her hair was tousled about, gore splattered on her clothes, and a sly smile on her face.

"Welcome to hell." She said, amusement underlying her tone, "I see you finally got my message."

The Doctor raised an eyebrow, "What message?"

River sighed, "I waited two days for you, and you appear here just on a whim?"

"Two days and you were wondering where I was?"

"Well, you're not one to show up late to a party."

"You call this a party?" The Doctor asked, an eyebrow raised.

"Well, zombie apocalypse, party, same difference..." River said with a shrug.

The Doctor entered the TARDIS, River following after. He pinched the bridge of his nose, "How do you expect me to stop a zombie apocalypse?"

River closed the TARDIS doors. "I don't," she smiled and kissed her husband gently despite the gore on her clothes.

"I just needed a shower."

She tapped her husband's nose and bounded up the steps and down the TARDIS hallway.

The Doctor's eyes followed her retreating form.

"Coming, Sweetie?" River called, voice echoing down off the walls.

~DW~

**I do not own Doctor Who. Hope you enjoyed it! Had a random zombie plot bunny pop in my head so...**

**Comments and reviews are appreciated. Leave me a prompt at: of-spoilers-and-bowties, on tumblr.**


	4. Chapter 4

The Doctor took a deep breath. He was going to miss this version of himself, his accent, the eyebrows, and his grumpy, no funny business attitude. He glanced around his empty TARDIS, void of anyone beside himself.

Clara was long gone, moved on with her life. And the Doctor couldn't blame her, she was a human and short lived, but that didn't mean he didn't miss her. Over time, it seemed as if everyone he had ever come to love eventually moved on, or died.

He sighed, he was so old. The Doctor had done, learned, seen, and loved so much. His hearts was worn, broken, and tired. He wondered how much longer he was to live. Once, a long time ago, he ran from death. He still does, but not quite as fast as he used to.

Sometimes he wished for death. He wished that it would all end, that all the pain and regrets would fade away and he would be gone from this life and moved on to the next, if there even was one. He pondered for a moment whether he would go to heaven or hell. The Doctor expected the latter, but his companions always said he was too harsh with himself.

He could feel the regeneration coming; he could stop it, if he wished. He could die. Twelve was a good number. It was the final number on a clock, and maybe his final number. The Doctor took a deep breath, and made his decision. He closed his eyes and concentrated, severing the regeneration energy and throwing it away.

A wave of pain hit him instantly, knocking the breath from his lungs. He stumbled backwards, hands grasping the TARDIS console for support. He took a deep breath, the air tasting so sweet in his lungs.

_So this is what it's like to die._ He thought, closing his eyes for a moment, maybe he would see the ones he had lost so long ago, maybe he would see River. He opened his eyes, the feeling of dread rushing over him as he realized, even if there were a heaven, there was a chance she wasn't there. He had uploaded her consciousness to a computer; after she faded there is no telling where her soul had come to rest.

He turned around slowly, biting down on his tongue, the pain in his side excruciating. He looked down where his hand clutched his side, blood seeped through his fingers. He looked away trying to ignore the wound.

"Alright, old girl," the Doctor said lovingly, running his hand over the console, "One last trip?"

The TARDIS hummed, but a different kind of hum from usual (and yes, there is a difference between hums). This hum was almost sad, yet comforting at the same time.

The dying Time Lord went to pull a lever on the console, when a buzzing noise came from behind. He turned around as fast as his wound would allow, his breath caught in his throat.

There stood River Song, his wife. He went to step towards her, but crumpled slightly. After a moment he managed to stand.

"River," he whispered; her name like a prayer on his lips.

"I am not River Song. I am a TARDIS interface."

His hearts sunk, his face falling with them, "River, please." He pleaded with the hologram, wanting it to be her for one moment. Even if it weren't really her, pretending was better than nothing

"I am not River Song. I am a TARDIS interface." The hologram repeated.

The Doctor quivered as he took a step towards her. It had her face, it had her hair, and oh, it had her voice. The holograms eyes were so sad, as if it knew that he wanted the real River.

"Please, River. I'm begging you, please for one moment, be real. For me, please," He pleaded, his voice desperate and eyes shimmering. he closed his eyes, wishing with all his might that just once, the universe would be gracious.

"I'm always real."

The Doctor's head snapped up. River was smiling sadly down at him.

"Hello Sweetie," River walked forward and cradled his face in her hands. A little voice in the back of his head told him that he was hallucinating and River wasn't actually there, but he pushed it away, not caring. For one moment he ignored the facts and believed that she was here and alive.

Tears streamed down his face silently, "Will you stay?" he asked, feeling like a child.

River smiled, "Always, Sweetie, always." She kissed his forehead lovingly. The next moment the Time Lord was on the floor. The Doctor wasn't sure if he fell, or if River had slowly lowered him, honestly he didn't care. His head rested in River's lap. Her fingers massaged his scalp and played with his grey curls.

The Doctor listened silently as she talked, whispering to him all the things she remembered, like the time she shot his fez or when they were going to be sacrificed to the rain gods.

He would smile gently and chuckle slightly, despite the pain slowly creeping up his body and his labored breathing.

The TARDIS itself stared to fade, his attention solely on his wife. River had fallen silent, as if knowing his time was near.

"I love you," He whispered, for it was all he could manage. Black rimmed the edge of his vision, but he saw her smile.

"I love you too, Sweetie. I love you too."

The Doctor took in a painful breath, "River, I-I'm scared."

River caressed her husband's face, "I know, dear, so was I."

A tear slid down the Doctor's face, "I'm sorry."

He didn't need to say what for, they both knew. She wiped his tear away with her thumb.

"I know, love, I know. It's okay, you didn't know."

The Doctor took a deep breath, his lungs burning at the effort, "But if I had known, you would still be alive-"

"Hush," River ordered, gently, "It's not your fault. You couldn't have known, and if you did, it would have altered our timeline and eventually would have torn the universe apart.

"You did that for me," the Doctor whispered.

"That was different, dear." She said, "Please, let's not discuss it."

The Doctor nodded. He closed his tired eyes and listened. River started to sing an old lullaby, one his mother would sing to him when he was a babe. How River even knew this lullaby, would forever be a mystery.

He calmed, his breathing slowed, as did his hearts. He felt himself slipping away, he grasped for River's hand. She grabbed it and squeezed tight, "I'm right here, love, right here."

The Doctor took a final breath, "River. . ." he uttered.

It felt as if water was rushing over him, cool, peaceful water, like a river. Because in the end, that's all he wanted.

~DW~

**GAH! I know, I know, I'm an awful human being! I'm sorry this isn't Eleven/River, but I felt as if I needed to post this. Thank you to all my reviewers and favs/followers! You guys are the reason I keep posting! Please leave reviews and tell me how I'm doing and if you want more chapters! Thanks! :P**

**Leave me prompts on tumblr at: of-spoilers-and-bowties**

**I do not own Doctor Who.**


	5. Chapter 5

The door opened silently, the quiet padding of little feet foretelling who was entering.

"Jack. Jack, wake up." Amelia whispered, her voice carrying a hushed urgency. The younger child grumbled and clutched his stuffed Sontaran closer to his chest.

Amelia huffed and shook her brother gently, "Come on, Jack. Wake up. We have to make Mummy's surprise!"

Jack's eyes shot open as he realized what had to be done. He pushed back the covers and left his stuffed toy by his pillow. He took his sister's hand and they exited the room. They crept through the TARDIS hallways, the only sound to be heard was the padding of tiny feet and the occasional 'Shh!' pointed in Jack's direction.

The two soon entered the kitchen and Amelia turned to her brother, "Ready?" she asked. Jack nodded furiously. Amelia smiled, "Good then, let's get started."

~DW~

The Doctor woke, not knowing what exactly had awoken him. Maybe it was the TARDIS, maybe it was his father's intuition, but he knew something was off. He slowly slid out of bed, careful not to wake River.

He walked down the TARDIS corridors and came to his son's bedroom. He peeked his head in the open door and saw an empty bed. For a split second, something seized the Doctor's hearts, maybe it was fear. He mind ran through every possible scenario before he took a deep breath. He cleared his mind. Jack had most likely had a bad dream, slipped out of bed and crawled in with his sister.

The Doctor turned and headed for his eldest's room. Seeing the same situation as before, the Doctor took a moment to calm himself.

_Don't worry. They're still on the TARDIS. They're probably just-_

His thoughts were interrupted by faint giggling echoing throughout the TARDIS. He followed the sound, determined to find out what his children were up to.

~DW~

Amelia laughed as Jack sneezed, flour getting up his nose.

"What are you two doing?"

Amelia froze and Jack lowered himself from view, "Uh oh," he whispered.

"Hi Daddy," Amelia greeted, a forced smile on her face.

Both children were covered in flour from head to toe. Bowls, pans, and other cooking utensils were all over the table. Eggs were scattered here and there, most broken. Some sort of gooey goop was splattered all over the place, so basically, the place was a mess.

"What exactly is going on?" the Doctor asked, running a hand through his hair, tugging on it slightly.

"Well, you see," Amelia started, "We tried to make breakfast for Mummy, s-since it's Mother's Day." Amelia's bottom lip had begun to tremble slightly, "I tried to get down the flour and spilled it and the eggs wouldn't crack right, and oh-" She hid her face in her hands, quiet crying noises coming from her.

The Doctor surged forward to comfort his daughter, but slipped and landed on his back, something wet and sticky seeping through the back of his shirt.

Both children stood frozen, Jack looked horrified and Amelia looked as if she was trying to decide whether she should laugh or cry harder.

The Doctor didn't know what exactly made him do it, maybe it was due to this regeneration's wackiness or maybe it was just his children's expression, but he started to chuckle quietly, soon bellowing with laughter.

Jack joined it first, flowed shortly by his sister. The Doctor stood up and tossed flour on himself.

"Look, Jack!" Amelia said, "Daddy looks like you!"

Jack examined his father, a smiled lighting up his face. "Yay! Daddy looks like me!"

"Or maybe," the Doctor started, "You look like Daddy?"

Jack squealed with laughter as his father sprinkled flour on the boy, and thus started the "Great Flour War".

~DW~

Jack laughed, throwing a handful of flour at his father. The Doctor quickly dodged the flying powder.

"Ha! You missed!" he laughed.

Amelia laughed, but quickly silenced. A small gasp of horror coming from her lips as she allowed the flour to fall through her fingers. Jack's eyes grew wide, and the Doctor knew who stood behind him.

"River, I-I can explain," the Doctor started, turning around to face his wife. River had flour on her shirt from where Jack had missed. The young boy tried to hide behind his older sister.

"You better," she said, walking forward to her husband, "And you can start by telling me why you lot always have all the fun when I'm gone." She snuck a look at her children, a smirk plastered on her lips.

The Doctor's face light up with a smile, but it soon was replaced with a look of surprise and River pelted his face with the white substance. Amelia and Jack tried to hide their giggles, and River chuckled.

"You realize," The Doctor began, his tone mocking seriousness, a small smile on his mouth, "This means war."

River smiled coyly, "When does it not?"

With a battle cry the Doctor dove behind the table, towards the children. Both squealed, Amelia running to her mother and Jack staying with his father.

"Us boys have to stick together right?" the Doctor asked his son. The young boy nodded.

"Good, now then let's-"

His sentence was cut off as flour rained down on them. Jack squealed as they scrambled away. The Doctor sprung up, tossing flour wildly, hoping it would hit someone. Amelia's squeals confirmed the outcome.

Somehow, at some point and time in the battle, the children had teamed up against the adults. So, River and the Doctor were crouched beside the fridge, waiting for their children to make the first move.

"So, you're not angry?" the Doctor asked quietly.

"Does it look like I am angry?" River said, she smiled gently, "Don't worry, Sweetie. You have done much worse in the past."

The Doctor smiled at River, kissing her lightly, "Happy Mother's Day." He whispered, forehead still touching hers. River kissed him despite the flour raining down on them and the squealing protests of their children.

~DW~

**I thought that a happy, fluffy chapter would make up for the sadness of last chapter! **

**I meant to post this yesterday, but life got in the way (as usual). So here is a Mother's Day special. Happy belated Mother's Day to all those mothers out there! Thank you for all you do!**

**Amelia is eight years old and Jack is four years old.**

**I am accepting prompts.**

**I do not own Doctor Who.**


	6. Chapter 6

The Doctor always knew this day would come. That River would leave on the damning trip, never to return. Though he knew, it didn't soften the blow. No, it only seemed to worsen it.

This regeneration didn't favor alcohol, but the Doctor had nearly drowned himself in it. The burning sensation down his throat was somewhat comforting. Honestly he didn't know if he was trying to drown out his sorrow or find a certain someone at the bottom of a bottle. Every single one he had emptied so far proved worthless, him neither feeling better nor magically finding River.

He'd probably wake up hating himself, but in the moment he didn't care. All he knew was that his hearts were broken and he wanted to forget. They say alcohol would make you forget your problems momentarily, but all the Doctor could see was his problems stacked miles high.

The sorrowful Time Lord took brought the bottle to his lips and wished he had something stronger. He finished the bottle, his blood starting to boil. Why did this always happen to him? Everyone always got their happily ever after, so why couldn't he?. He tossed the empty bottle away. It smashed into a million shards, pieces scattered across the room.

The Doctor wasn't sure why, maybe it was all his grief and mixed with all his problems or maybe it was his frustration mixed with all the alcohol, but he blew his top.

The Oncoming Storm, now looking like one, swiped his arm across the table, sending its contents clattering on the floor.

"Why?" he screamed into the empty air, "Why can't I have anything?" He asked the universe, but received no reply. "You take everything and everyone I love away from me! Why?" Spit flew from his mouth as he shouted the words.

He could feel River here. He could feel her shoulder brushing his. He could feel her hand brushing his, her lips on his cheek.

He cried out in his rage and flipped the table, his eyes dark with a mad man's fury.

He could see her hair, her eyes, and her smile. He could smell the scent of leather and cinnamon that always seemed to linger on her. He could hear her laugh.

She was everywhere, but at the same time she was nowhere to be seen. Everywhere he looked, he could see her in the belongings that she had left behind and little things here and there that just screamed "River".

It set him off, he surged forward, grabbing whatever reminded him of her, a picture, lamp, book, anything really.

Vases were smashed, clothes were burned. The Doctor continued, blind in his rage, until he noticed a book that he was about to throw into the orange flames of the fireplace.

Its blue cover faded, the pages worn, wrinkled, and yellowed.

The Doctor paused, his mind clearing, anger receding. He ran a hand over it lovingly. Here, as he held his wife's journal, the weight of what he did crashed down on him. He looked around at the destruction he had caused and held the book close to his chest. He fell to the floor, silent sobs racking through his body. He cried, with no one to comfort him, a few stray tears soaking into the journal in his arms.

He cried, begging the universe to bring her back, to please, just this once, do something for him. To give him one little favor. He had saved the universe so many times; he was owed so much more than what he was asking. The universe stayed silent, looking down on her lonely hero, refusing to help him in his sorrow.

The Time Lord cried himself to sleep, too exhausted to do anything more.

~DW~

The Doctor woke the next morning, in his bed, a killer head ache, and his hearts still heavy. He walked through the TARDIS corridors, no memory of the night before. All the items destroyed in his havoc, restored.

Though the TARDIS couldn't give her thief everything he desired, she could take care of him. That is exactly what she did and what she plans to do.

~DW~

River wasn't sure what she expected when she entered the Library, but it certainly wasn't this. She didn't expect the toothpick of a man the Tenth Doctor was.

She didn't mind really, she had met him before and he was still the Doctor, just different from _her_ Doctor. And to be honest, she really quite liked the sexy specs.

But this was different, for some unknown reason, he acted as if he didn't know her. River didn't worry about it at first, she trusted the Doctor and he must have some sort of reason to be acting like this.

Eventually she called him over to consult with her diary, but she knew. That feeling of dread that had settled in her stomach and she didn't like it. She looked into his eyes and knew it was no use asking, but she still did, clinging to one slither of hope she had left.

She asked him about the Byzantium, which was stupid, of course. Then she asked him about Asgard, surely he had done Asgard.

A sense of pure dread, fear, and horror went through her as he stared at her blankly. He didn't know her. Fate had caught up with her, like she always knew, but it didn't soften the blow. No, it made it harder.

She begged him to recognize her, to know who she was. He looked her straight in the eye and said, "I don't know you."

River replaced the walls she had lowered for him and stood up, her previous vulnerability gone. Oh, and it was hard. It's always hard to be the strong one. It's always hard to be the one that knows.

They continued throughout the day, River getting frustrated at his obvious distrust of her. All she wanted to do was slap some sense into that man, but he was too young, and she was too old.

Finally she had to use her last resort, "I need you to know you can trust me." She pulled him to the side and uttered his name into his ear. The greatest secret in the universe, the question that must never be answered was answered right there in that little room.

She leaned back and stared into his shocked eyes, she nearly wanted to cry, "Are we good?"

As they continued their adventure, River realized where this was going and how it was going to end, and it hurt her heart, but she ignored it., telling herself that the Doctor would make a plan and save them all. She tried to push away the truth of the situation, tried to push away fate, but one can never push away fate; she should know that by now.

The Doctor did come up with a plan, a stupid plan that would end up with him dead, and River couldn't allow that. She felt awful when she brought the pipe down on his head.

_Forgive me, my love._

She handcuffed him to a pipeline, all the while her hearts heavy.

River sat in the big metal chair, attaching wires and hooking up cords. The Doctor's plan was brilliant, but it was a one way trip, a one way trip to hell.

River thought of her mother's orders, _"You be a good girl and you take care of him."_

River nearly laughed, if only Amy knew what it had come to.

River was nearly finished when he woke up. She closed her eyes when she heard him stirring, it would have been so much easier if he had just remained unconscious.

"Oh, no, no, no, no. Come on, what are you doing? That's my job!" the Doctor protested.

River smiled, despite the dread she was feeling, "Oh, and I'm not allowed to have a career, I suppose?" She replied in a joking tone, her mask that she used in the earlier days reappearing.

The Doctor surged forward, or rather tried to, "Why am I handcuffed?" he asked tugging against the cool metal. "Why do you even have handcuffs?"

River smirked, she couldn't resist, "Spoilers."

"This is not a joke!" the Doctor insisted, "Stop this now!" He ordered, but it sounded like begging, "This is going to kill you! I'd have a chance, you don't have any!"

"You don't have a chance, and neither do I," River snapped. "I'm timing it for the end of the countdown, "River explained, "There will be a blip in the command flow. That way it will improve our chances of a clean download."

"River, please. No." the Doctor was truly begging her.

"Funny thing is," she started, "this means you've always known how I was going to die. All that time we've been together, you knew I was coming here." He voice carried sadness and sorrow towards the man she loved.

"The last time I saw you, the real you, the future you, I mean, you turned up on my doorstep, with a new haircut and suit. You took me to Darillium to see the Singing Towers. What a night that was. The Towers sang, and you cried."

The Computers monotone voice cut through the air, "Auto deconstruct in one minute."

"You wouldn't tell me why," River continued, "but I suppose you knew it was time. My time. Time to come to the library. You even gave me your sonic screwdriver. That should have been a clue."

The Doctor struggled to get where River had placed her diary and both their screwdrivers just out of his reach.

"There's nothing you can do," River told him.

"You can let me do this," the Doctor insisted.

"If you die here, it'll mean I've never met you."

"Time can be rewritten," he assured her.

"Not those times, not one line," River nearly growled, oh, she was being so selfish right now, "Don't you dare. It's okay. It's okay." River said. "It's not over for you. You'll see me again."

River wasn't sure when she started crying, but she was now. "You've got all that to come," she told him. "You and me, time and space. You watch us run."

The Doctor was still strained against his bonds, "River, you know my name."

"Autodestruct in ten," the computer's voice rang out.

"You whispered my name in my ear."

9 . . . 8 . . . 7 . . .

"There is only one reason I would ever tell anyone my name. There's only one time I could." The Doctor said, realizing what exactly River was to him, or at least future him.

"Hush, now," River told him. Her end was so near and she wanted to run from all of this, but one thing kept her grounded. The Doctor, just like he always did.

4 . . . 3 . . .

"Spoilers," she whispered, tears in her eyes. She loved that man so much, so, so much. He better flipping know that.

2 . . . 1 . . .

She joined two cables together and it felt as if her body was burning up, and all she could think about was how much she loved him and what the poor man was doing on the other side of the spectrum, and then there was nothing.

~DW~

**I apologize for all the feels you may have gone through reading this. It popped into my head and seeing that I have no prompts I wrote this.**

**Shout out to all my lovely reviewers, favorites/follows! You guys are the best!**

**Any who, I do not own Doctor Who!**

**Until a plot bunny pops into my head or I get a prompt!**


	7. Different

It was different. Not a bad different or a necessarily good different, but just different in general. He was older now, not that she minded. She viewed him more as a silver fox, a cranky one at that. The Doctor's grouchy demeanor was one she hadn't experienced with him, well, perhaps a touch in the ninth incarnation of her husband, but not to the extreme that it was now. He wasn't as touchy as his previous selves, River can't say was the biggest fan of that. She missed his lingering hugs and excessive hand holding. (Not that she would admit it aloud.) He wasn't as clumsy as before, but he had his moments in which his arms and legs seemed to have minds of their own and he couldn't quite corral himself. He had moments when childlike glee would fill his eyes as he explained a new planet to her, waving his arms above his head as he spoke.

It was in those moments she saw the Eleven in him and something would pierce through her heart. She missed him. River would never deny that. He was her first love. Yes, the Doctor was still the same man underneath, but it was the Eleventh Doctor she fell for first. It was him with his child-like mannerisms, comical food tastes, and insane love for hats that stole her hearts. She missed his eyes and the way they would look at her as if she hung the stars (and perhaps she did, but that's another story for another time.) Don't get her wrong, he still looks at her like that, but his eyes are different, replaced with icy blue orbs that seem much harsher than his previous warm green ones. She loves Twelve, River really does, but there are some things no one can replace, not even the Doctor.

Sometimes, in moments that were few and far in between (but always seemed to linger in the back of her consciousness) it felt like she was betraying Eleven. Yes, yes, it's silly. She knows that, he's still the same man. Hell, she's courted younger versions of the Doctor and had no problem, but why with Twelve? It was easy with Ten, they threw flirts back and forth always stealing glances and annoying the hell out of each other. She didn't feel guilty then. Perhaps it was because she knew the man he was going to become, because she knew he would regenerate into the man who she knew would love her fully. But Eleven's gone now, dead you might say, shoved back in the Doctor's bookcase of past lives, left to collect dust like an unwanted book and here she was smooching up to the next suitor. She could almost see Eleven getting jealous of himself, sputtering curses and warnings at his future incarnation.

It was still the same man with all the same memories and experiences, she must have told herself that a million times, but it was all so different.

Though things are different, some things remain the same. They still fight. Sometimes it's a little spat over how she was flying the TARDIS incorrectly (or really how he never flew the time-space machine correctly) or a full blown argument which involves more than a few cuss words and sentences shouted in different languages, slamming doors and thrown books (she'd love to actually get a good shot at t\his thick skull some day.) They still go on adventures, not all of them are death defying, but most are. They still share the same mug (the Doctor would say she steals it and they don't share it, but he still hasn't bought himself a new mug therefore River concludes he doesn't hate it as much as he swears he does.) He still bops her nose (something she endures with a smile and a playful huff) and River still wears his clothes on rainy days (something she knows he secretly loves.)

She still sits and ponders things as he tinkers on the TARDIS or inventing some new gadget he swears will change the world. The Doctor's doing so now, fiddling with some circuit underneath his console, his bum sticking up in the air as he struggles to reach a wire (she's definitely not staring.) He curses as he smacks his head against the console and River doesn't contain the smile that slips on her lips.

Sure, things are different. The Doctor snaps at her much more easily now, a frown more often than not graces his features, his British accent replaced with a thick Scottish drawl which she knows he snatched from her mother, and he has no idea whether she actually attempted to look nice (You always look beautiful, he says). The Doctor's not nearly as emotional, or at least not as good at showing it. Of course he's not Eleven, how could he be?

Now that she thinks about it, River sees it like this: The Eleventh Doctor was more of her lover. The man who sends you flowers and shows up to whisk you away on a date, the romanticizes you just to see that twinkle in your eye and makes you feel as warm and gushy inside. The Twelfth Doctor was more of the husband that Eleven never could have been, the one that is there with you everyday (or most days) and that you spend life with, the one that knows what's going on in your life and you don't have to play catch up whenever you see each other. Not that it was Eleven's fault. No, it was never his fault or anyone's fault. It was just the things played out. Eleven loved her, she never doubted that, but Twelve? Twelve wasn't travelling in an opposite timeline than she was. Twelve knew her, everything about her. He wasn't missing pieces of the puzzle, he had all of them. He could love her and understand her more than Eleven could. Sure, The Twelfth Doctor drove her insane and made her want to smack him upside the head sometimes, but he wasn't Eleven. They were infinitely different, and that was the exact way it should be.

River smiles as she watches the Doctor edge out from beneath the TARDIS console, rubbing the sore spot on his head. "What?" he asks, frowning slightly as he sees her staring. She just smiles, shaking her head gently as a small laugh bubbles up in her throat.

"Sure, sure," he starts, turning back to his work, "Laugh it up, I'm sure it's simply hilarious." He picks up at cosmic binder (a tool that resembles a very large screwdriver with a sparkly blue tip) "You know, next time you get hurt I'm going to sit back and laugh as you writhe in pain."

"Of course Sweetie," River says, remaining in the chair, pulling the blanket that had slipped off her shoulders back into place. "How insensitive of me, I'm sure at your old age and old bump would be excoriating painful."

He throws her a glare, attack eyebrows on full power. She supposes he's trying to be intimidating, but she just finds it amusing. The Doctor ignores the smile creeping onto River's lips as he crawls back under the console, muttering something to himself.

River leans back in her chair, a contented sigh parting her lips. She takes a sip of tea from their shared mug and smiles. Things are different and she wouldn't have them any other way.

"Would you stop staring at my bum!?"

Well, some things never change.

* * *

**Oh my gosh. I am so sorry guys. Life has just been dropping bricks on me lately and i just haven't had the time to attend to this fic like I should. Will you forgive me? I can't promise to update regularly, but I'll try my best not to let it be a year before I do so. Tell me what you think. This is set during the 24 years on Darrilium (did I spell that right?). The more reviews I get the sooner you might get a one-shot. :) **

**Anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed this! Bye :P**


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